Reggie Adewunmi: On Wellness, Grace, and Creating Your Village
"My mom taught me through her actions to parent in ways that feel right for me and to truly care about my child’s feelings, be gentle, and loving."
Regina “Reggie” Adewunmi shares with us her beautiful journey through motherhood as a homeschooling mom of her young daughter. The doula and recent NY to LA transplant shares how she balances work, wellness and motherhood, the lessons she carries with her from her own late mother, and the importance of a supportive community above all.
Reggie, tell us about you:
My name is Reggie and I currently live in Los Angeles with my husband and our 3 year old daughter. We moved here from Long Island, New York just a few months ago so we’re still settling in! I’ve been a doula for over a decade.
What did becoming a mom look like for you?
My husband and I were together as very young people for years before getting engaged and getting married. We decided we’d wait a year after marriage to start a family. Thanks to our lucky stars, we tried once and got pregnant right away! Although there was so much to worry about given I was 5 months pregnant when the world shut down, transitioning into motherhood felt very natural and was a sweet light in what seemed like a grim reality in the pandemic.
What was the most unexpected part of your motherhood journey?
The most unexpected part of motherhood was just how tough breastfeeding would be at first. I knew it would be challenging but I underestimated the obstacles that could come with breastfeeding. Thanks to great support by my village and prayers- I got through those hard beginnings and still currently comfort nurse at night.
How does Matrescence’s Mission to “mother the mother” resonate with you as a mom?
Mother the mother is such a beautiful and necessary concept. Many times it’s forgotten that the mother too needs attention, extra love and care. As moms we are often giving more than receiving, but we need TLC too! As a mom whose own mom passed away before I had my daughter, I have found myself in moments really feeling that void when I really could use some mothering myself.
In what ways do you find wellness in your day? Do you struggle with prioritizing it in your life?
I very often find it hard to make time for self care in my day. Most days caring for myself looks like taking a long hot shower or a trip to Target, with my daughter watching youtube on my phone in the cart. My days are usually filled with tending to my daughter who I homeschool, assisting my husband who is an artist and handling logistics at home. I feel so grateful to be here at this point in my life, when I’m caring for myself it’s usually in prayer and meditating on the blessings.
What is the best thing you learned about parenting and who did you learn it from?
The best advice I’ve gotten about parenting came indirectly from my late mom. She taught me through her actions to parent in ways that feel right for me and to truly care about my child’s feelings, be gentle, and loving.
What strategies have you employed as you strive for balance as a working mom?
I’ve struggled with feeling like I need to get it all done. I’ve found that making a list is about writing goals, not necessarily must do’s and it doesn’t have to be all done right now. Prioritizing my time, and carving out time to “wing it” is so important. I haven’t mastered it yet at all, but I strive to put goals into different buckets or categories, and try to hit a goal in each bucket for more balance.
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