Moms for Moms Founder & Her Mom On Motherhood

Founder of Moms for Moms and mother to two girls, Danielle Krupa devotes her career to helping single mothers in need. We interviewed her alongside her own mom and inspiration for her company, Deborah Pesses. Danielle shares how her mother’s sacrifices shaped her, and how Deborah’s commitment to making sure meals and holiday celebrations were always special is carried on in her home with her own daughters. Deborah reflects on how much she loves seeing her own daughter as a mom, and talks about how proud she is of Danielle for being able to show up for her girls in ways she herself couldn’t. The love between this mother-daughter duo jumps off the page and transcends the years as they share what they’ve learned about parenting.

Tell us a little about you both:

Danielle: I’m a wife, my husband and I met almost 16 years ago at a yoga studio and it was 100% love at first sight. I’m a mother to the two most incredible little girls, ages 8 & 10. And I’m the Founder & Executive Director of Moms for Moms, a NYC-based nonprofit that supports single mothers in need.

Deborah: I’m from Texas and I have been a hairstylist for over 35 years and am also a part-time yoga teacher. But my favorite role is that of mother, step-mother and grandmother.

Deborah, what rituals or traditions did you pass down to your daughter when it comes to motherhood? 

My love of cooking and spending time together as a family in the kitchen. And making every holiday feel very special and big.

Danielle, do you continue these rituals in your parenting with your own children? How and why?

Absolutely. My two daughters are always in the kitchen with me, whether acting as my sous-chef, baking together, or just creating a lot of memories around food and time together cooking. Food is a big part of our everyday life and we love to celebrate with food.

And holidays – absolutely. My mom always made everything really fun and exciting, whether she was baking an easter bunny shaped cake, going all out decorating for Halloween, or staying up late to make sure when I woke up on Christmas morning it felt really special. She always went out of her way to make holidays feel like a really important celebration and that’s something we still love as a family.

Danielle, what is the best thing you learned from your mom about parenting?

One thing that I always valued about my mom was that she is very easy to talk to. As a kid, she was always the mom my friends asked for advice. We’ve always had a very open relationship and I’ve always been comfortable talking to her about anything. She managed to be a mom but also a best friend at the same time and I don’t think that’s an easy thing to accomplish.

Danielle, what inspired you to start Moms for Moms? 

I founded Moms for Moms back in 2014 because as a new mother with a second child on the way, I couldn’t help but think of my own mother and what she went through when I was a baby. She left a really bad situation to raise me on her own. She struggled every single day to provide for me, often working multiple jobs at one time. After becoming a mom myself, I saw how overwhelming it can be to have a baby, even if you have resources, access, and support. I thought about my own mom entering this new role with the added stress of doing it on her own, providing for me, and keeping a roof over our heads. I knew that I needed to support new mothers, mothers just like my own, that were struggling to receive the postpartum and newborn essentials they need and deserve... and so Moms for Moms was born.

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Deborah, how does it feel seeing your own baby as a mother? What is your favorite part? 

Oh my god, all of it!! She’s the best mom. She’s able to do for them and be there for them in a way I wasn’t able to. She’s such a hands-on mom and it makes me so very proud. She’s an amazing mother.

What does self care look like to both of you?

Danielle: I don’t stop from the minute I wake up, whether it’s parenting, my nonprofit work, or life in general, so the one thing I value most for my own-self-care is sleep. I’m in bed and asleep by 10pm most weeknights and make that an absolute priority.

Deborah: This is still something I’m learning and working on. But mostly it’s about quiet time, trying to listen to your inner self. And a good massage never hurts!

Deborah, what advice would you give to a new mom struggling with balancing her roles and responsibilities?

You have to be strong. Take a deep breath and take things one step at a time. You don’t have to do everything all at once. It will work out and everything will be ok. It’s hard, but it’s worth it.

Danielle, what do you think is the most challenging aspect of being a mom, and how do you manage it?

Danielle: I definitely think it’s made me a stronger, more confident person. I think it’s given me a purpose that is beyond anything I could have ever imagined. And it’s also made my heart burst open in a way I didn’t know was possible.

Deborah: You definitely can’t be selfish. You learn quickly that your child comes before all others. I was a kid when I had a kid so I had to learn that lesson early.

What’s one thing you wish you’d known before becoming a mom?

Danielle: That no one is managing it all perfectly. So often there is an expectation on mothers that we have to be all things to all people all the time. But the truth is, that balance ebbs and flows. Everyone is just doing the best they can.

Deborah: I wish I had taken Lamaze classes because I had no idea the amount of pain I was about to be in. (laughs)

If you could sum up the relationship between the two of you in one sentence, what would it be?

Danielle: I owe everything I am and everything I have to the sacrifices she made to provide me with a great life.

Deborah: She’s my heart, she’s my person, and she’s the first person I want to tell everything to.